The best part of politics: because they're all screwing us anyway.

Saturday, June 18, 2005

Stop gay penguin harassment

Yup, a German mayor is circulating a petition asking for gay penguin rights, in the case of gay penguins who are set to be seduced by female penguins--who are apparently well trained in the use of weapons of mass seduction--at their zoo.

After all, penguins are people too...wait, no.

But if only Neal Horsley's poor mule had the right of choice in sexual partners that is now being procured for penguins, it would surely be much happier. And the mayor makes a moving plea:

Although the gay penguins in your city’s zoo are not entitled to vote, please protect them from this organized and coercive harassment by means of feminine seductive arts. Let the penguins continue unhindered in mating with whomever their hearts desire.

But hey, a little "organized and coercive harassment by means of feminine seductive arts" never hurt anyone...that's what I call fun.


  • At 6:46 PM, Blogger jurassicpork said…

    Homosexual penguins are more tastefully attired than their more consrevative counterparts, eschewing the tuxedo for paisley ascots tied in a knot to accent soft, understated pastels.

  • At 7:31 PM, Blogger Boinkette said…

    Indeed...they prefer colors like lavender, peach, and periwinkle to the typical penguin colors of black and white.


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