Boinkette

The best part of politics: because they're all screwing us anyway.

Monday, October 24, 2005

She's got it

Representative Linda Sanchez of California made some very astute remarks at the Funniest Celebrity in Washington Contest:

"Top Ten Reasons I Don't Date Republicans" by Linda Sanchez
10. The only time they believe in fiscal restraint is when the dinner bill comes.
9. His idea of getting to second base is fondling my stock portfolio.
8. He thinks that Emily's List is a call girl service.
7. His idea of oral stimulation is getting me to recite the Contract with America.
6. He thinks that white pantyhose and pearls are sexy--and you should see what he wants
me to wear.
5. Because when Republicans say that they want to create opportunities for minorities, that means they want to date me
and [her sister] Loretta.
4. Despite all the hype, I still can't find his weapon of mass destruction.
3. His pending prison term for political corruption is just another excuse for him to be emotionally unavailable.
2. Republicans are only interested in screwing the poor.
1. Because they make love like they make war: they lie to get in and don't have a plan for what to do once they get there.

Sunday, October 23, 2005

Ooh, money

Now if only I could actually see some of it...


My blog is worth $15,242.58.
How much is your blog worth?

Thursday, October 20, 2005

Methinks they doth protest too much

But stopping the leak is a noble cause....




Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Got wood?

It looks like Bush does.

Now when some guys say "She's such a doll," they're not joking...

My only question: when will there be a John Edwards version?

Sunday, October 09, 2005

Headline of the Day

Jurassic Pork found this headline on Americablog:

NYT: Bush has to do Miers alone

Well, better than doing her with Cheney, I say. Any marriage counselor can tell you presidential threesomes are a no-no.

Friday, October 07, 2005

Funny, that's the same thing Clinton said

Wow

It's not just me!

Apparently someone at Urban Dictionary thinks the same way I do:

Logrolling

Masturbation. Exclusively masturbation of men or boys, since "log" is another word for penis.
Phone sex convo between two gay male politicians:

Gay Politician 1: Maybe later we can go back to my place and I can take your census.
Gay Politician 2: Only if you'll filibuster.
Gay Politician 1: Reapportion me, baby
Gay Politician 2: Oh I'll do it, you carpetbagger.
Gay Politician 1: Porkbarrel me!
Gay Politician 1: There's some logrolling going on... IN MY PANTS.
Gay Politician 2: You want PROPORTIONAL REPRESENTATION?
Gay Politician 1: I think I have a majority of your ass.
Gay Politician 2: Oh man, I think I just lost my seat.
Gay Politician 1: I'm about to incumbent!
Gay Politician 2: Errg. Oh YEAH! This session of congress is now over.
Gay Politician 1: Care to adjourn, then?
Gay Politician 2: I just did.
Gay Politician 1: Can we call a special session?
Gay Politician 2: As long as you give me your soft money.
Source: Mark H, Aug 17, 2004